baby when you arrive

they already know you're made

of whitening & tightening & loss

it's an obvious secret you can tell

from the mishandling of loose curls

& how you smudge all the wrong

crayons at once in hopes of reassembling

anything close to pretty & soft

you're at the beach in a pink suit with the diaper inside

you carry an elephant cousin for comfort, not

interested in whatever rotten violence claims you,

though you know it exists all you have is outlines

& a set of eyes disjointed from the perfect

body they hoped for & what were they thinking

they should have never

allowed the races to mix &

create me. i am not so

powerful i will not break all

expectations you know

i am shaped like nothing

& doomed to be nothing

& what a toll on me